Friday, May 23, 2014

Why "Saving Maya"

I have started this blog to share what I am going through in my attempt to lead my daughter to adulthood successful and child free. I took her phone Thursday, May 8th, 2014 and I lost my mind. She was being and doing countless inappropriate things. From sending and receiving pictures of an adult nature. To late night video chats with too many boys to count. All the while letting her grades plummet. So needless to say I was unhappy. I screamed. I cried. I disciplined her. So now here I am about 2 weeks out from the Maya incident and I am still heartbroken over it.

She has apologized but I do not think she has any idea what the heck she is doing... She is jeopardizing her life... her safety...her future. Its insanity. Its like she does the opposite of what she should do to get the results that she wants. She wants to be popular, but the girls who appear or are promiscuous are not popular. They are ridiculed and treated poorly.

I am working on getting her into therapy and keep her busy this summer. One thing I must confess s that it sucks that I cannot trust her. I cannot let her have a phone and I do not feel comfortable leaving her at home by herself for any significant amount of time. I do not know when or if I will ever trust her again.

I feel as if the simple things I want from her she is in willing to even do. She doesn't keep her room clean or even take much pride in her appearance and yet she bugs me to get her hair weaved up or let her do fun stuff.All of that is not happening until I see her do he small things I have told her to do.

The first week after "the incident" we barely spoke. I didn't have anything to say to her. She acted as if everything was back to normal. I just wanted to scream. So then she 'apologized' but I do not know if I believe she is really sorry.I do not feel like I an seeing everything I need to see out of her. She has been so-so on having a pleasant attitude. She is hearing me tell her no a lot more. That will be my standard answer for awhile.

She did not have a perfect life, but she had a life and freedom and options that she did not appreciate. She also has a family that deserves her decency and respect. She needs to really step up and get her act together.